The stigma of birth order, will have people roll eyes, shutter and just plain say “Oh Yeah my __________ born” is exactly the same.
I’d like to give some inside scoop as we see it in our home and when I say we, I obviously mean me! 😉 We are the proud parents of three babies, 30, soon to be 22 and freshly as of today 19!
Just to mix it up I won’t start with the first born, or the baby, I will begin with the middle child. When our middle child was born, our first daughter, six weeks early, we were nervous, excited and prayed for her health. We were all so excited, big brother, who had to give up his throne of “only child” close to 9 years of holding that title was eager to meet his little sister and sibling. We were all over protective and boasting of the addition to our family. This little one entered the world six weeks early and was making leaps and bounds as a preemie, passing the expected charts. It was not soon after hubby and I joked with her attitude, she had middle child syndrome and we may have to try for another. Perhaps the joking was because once back in babyhood to have another was easier then taking the plunge almost nine years later.
Let me go to the first born, there is nothing like a first born, because you have never been a parent. You can control infinite possibilities because there is no sibling influence. There is wonder, confusion, excitement, crying from parents and baby, as well as laughter. You are not aware of great strides or failures with the first because you are like a duck, smooth on top of water and rapidly kicking underneath. We pushed him harder, not because we thought he knew it all but because we didn’t know any better. These are things the children born after the first do not realize. The first holds a special place in your life because all that unfolds is a first for all of you. We had almost nine years of thinking we knew it all and thankfully God gave us the good insight to have more children.
Ahh the baby ( I happen to hold that title as well with my siblings), everyone thinks they get away with it all. Here is a bit of insight, they have seen their siblings try, fail and or succeed at different attempts with sports, school and the parents. They have learned what works and what won’t and they have the advantage to the parents being a bit more tired ~ thanks to the older siblings. Most think the baby is spoiled, truth be told we as parents have learned what is truly important to us, our faith and our family at this point so passes may be given. Our baby decided to enter the world two days past due date, only a big deal when the first was four weeks early and the middle six weeks early, she was making a point ~ watch out mom, dad, and siblings.
We have been blessed over the years with a daughter-in-law, soon to be son-in-law and you know the baby seems to be happy with her significant other. We love our children, we love who they love, our family is based on faith and love and I would never change a moment in our history or our future as a growing family.
The only guarantee you get in this life is the current moment, so be present, love big, have faith and remember no matter your birth order your parents love you. If you are truly blessed your extended family will equally love you.
I often tell my children how I wish they were closer to home, truth be told, I love the life they lead, the way they have spread their wings and they know we are always here for them.